Twelve Weeks
Still Building
Before we start …
This is not a writing of inspiration or of arrival. It is one from the middle of building something new. A time of self-discovery and surviving. An honest account of moving forward in the messy middle.
I left my full-time clinical and academic leadership role at the end of January 2026. Months of planning, saving, and finishing out my credential training as a coach.
I was filled with anticipation, excitement, curiosity, and fear. For the first time, I was actually going to do the thing I had told myself I would do for years. The safety net of a regular paycheck, structure, and the identity of provider would be gone.
Days before I left, I asked myself: “Are you ready for this? What happens if you fall flat on your face?”
As a coach, I knew these thoughts were coming from a place of protection. My entire life, I was a provider. That does not just disappear because your kids are grown and living on their own.
I moved forward anyway.
My coaching practice had already opened in January while I was still working full-time. Coaching in the evenings, on weekends, writing on Substack in between everything else. Then the day came. My last day.
The feelings were bittersweet. I was leaving people I had worked alongside for years. But the road ahead was clear. A lot of work. Not just on the business, but on me.
I posted on Substack.
What happened next surprised me. People I had never met or spoken to showed up at the door of my first day on my own. Strangers offering encouragement, sharing their own stories, saying they were watching and rooting for me.
That moment taught me something I had not fully understood before. Substack is not simply a writing platform. It is a place where people who are considering the same thing you are doing go on the journey with you. It is an amazing community.
In the Middle
There is a lot of content from creators about being in the middle. It is messy. Doubt creeps in. You wonder if you did the right thing. You are not yet the new version of yourself and still holding parts of the old one.
It is all true.
Taking a leap requires a certain kind of courage.
Courage of mind.
Courage in self-belief.
Some might call it a certain kind of stupidity. Why would you leave a steady paycheck to put yourself through this kind of stress?
Because that is the point.
A paycheck is never a guarantee. Betting on yourself is hard. The reality of it is never fully felt until you are inside it. In the day-to-day of working for yourself, knowing you may need to develop skills you do not have yet. Building a structure where none exists.
Face obstacles that a 9-5 would have absorbed for you.
But here is what I know now: it is all your creation.
Then came the moment I needed most. My first two clients.
Not a milestone on a spreadsheet. An affirmation. Confirmation that what I was doing was something I was called to do. That the work was real. That the people were ready, and so was I.
I had originally given myself until the end of May to determine whether this was performing well enough to continue. Today, I am extending that deadline to the end of September.
Not because I am failing. Because I am making progress. That distinction matters.
Twelve Weeks
Still scared.
Still building.
Still wondering if this thing is going to work.
But here is the difference: I would not have it any other way.
The last 12 weeks have changed me in ways I did not fully anticipate. I am excited to see where the next 12 weeks take me.
Thank you for your support on this important journey. Leave a comment and let me know about your messy middle.
I did not become a coach because it was the next logical career move. I became a coach because I have lived the crossing. From performing success to asking for more. From functional to free. I know what it costs to stay fine. I also know what it feels like to feel free. If you are ready to have that conversation, I am ready to be in it with you.
With care,
Patrick LaRose, DNP, MSN/Ed., RN, NC-BC Board-Certified Coach | Life Coach lifenursecoach.com
I can’t wait to see where you take us in the next 12 weeks as well!!! It’s been a blessing to have you share your wisdom with us! You’re amazing Patrick, never stop!!!!
Thank you for sharing, Patrick. Your story is one of inspiration and I sincerely respect your courage to pursue what seems like more of a vocation for you than a job. As someone who is seeking a similar journey, I find a great deal of comfort in knowing that my fear and hesitation is shared by so many others. I hope you succeed because I think you have a real gift from the brief interaction I've had with you here. I think you're answering a true inner calling. Good luck, my friend!